Recently there have been a lot of things on my mind. Probably because now that my life is settling down and I am settling in to a routine so I have time to think. I’ve been thinking a lot about certain qualities that are lacking in me, namely a gentle and quiet spirit, discernment, humility, and contentment. Yep, not a big deal at all. But as I see this I am keenly aware that I am becoming the woman I will be and I want to be characterized by all of those things one day. It’s like I wake up every day and I have in my head this person who I want to be- strong but always under control and never bossy or domineering, always trusting God, always resting in his goodness, thinking of others and preferring them down to the smallest detail, and happy no matter what my circumstance is because I’m focused on Christ and allowing everything else to fade into the background. That’s who I want to be in my mind but I am constantly reminded of reality and that I am so far from living that way. I hear myself arguing when I should be encouraging. I feel my heart growing anxious and my chest getting tight when I should be trusting. I allow my heart to run after things in this world and allow my schedule to be filled up so I don’t have time to sit at Christ’s feet. I see myself rushing past my roommate so I can get my task done just a little bit quicker. I hate it. I hate it all. So the other day when I came across a quote about contentment on the GirlTalk blog it really hit me:
“What is contentment? It is having a satisfied mind in any situation. It is finding inner satisfaction in God alone and in His provision for you. It is experiencing His peace and confidence in difficult times. It is consciously enjoying the fact that God is good, even when your circumstances are not.” – Robert D. Jones, “Learning Contentment in All Your Circumstances”
I would even add that it is consciously enjoying the fact that God is good, even when your circumstances do not appear to be. It was good for my heart to be reminded of that as the last few weeks of summer fly past and I am looking towards the fall semester beginning with a small twinge of dread. I know that my life is about to get busy, that my mind is about to get tired, and that I am going to have to begin the juggling act once more in just a few short weeks. But God is good and He does good and He alone is my satisfaction and contentment (I am writing that more to tell myself than anyone else).
So enjoy these last few weeks of summer, but enjoy Christ more and know that no matter what your circumstance you can be content because nothing can separate you from His love.