I just returned from Master’s Annual Student Life Senior Staff Retreat at Pine Mountain. On the tail end of the week there’s a few things I’m thinking about….but I can’t think about then for long cause I have to finish my D.S. by Wednesday! I have to get cracking! But first, my thoughts….
1. I really miss my family and I really miss the bay area. One of my biggest regrets this year is sacrificing the opportunity to walk with my family through some of their trials this year because I was so focused on my own and those in my dorm. I can’t wait to get to be with them for some time this summer.
2. I feel a lot more light and free at this point in my life than I have for the past…oh…9 months. It’s easy to want it to be this way all the time. That’s not necessarily right/okay, but I want to enjoy it for now.
3. We had to choose three words to describe our year at the retreat. I chose adultifying, soteriological, and non-perennial. Translation: I grew up a lot, I learned a lot about my need for Jesus, and I never want to do it again. If they had told me everything that would happen over this last year before I began, I would have chosen a much different path. Thankfully, I have a Father who is wiser than I am guiding and directing my path. I needed every single day of it…but I still don’t want to do it over.
4. I’m a real, big, jerk. The Lord is continually reminding me what high standards I have for others and how hard I am on them when they fail to meet my standards. That’s lame. There’s a lot of conversations/relationships/reactions I wish I could go back and re-do and change those standards before-the-fact. This is where I really have to fight to believe I’m forgiven.
5. During RD retreat they asked us what one thing we learned this year was. I told them I learned to pray. I don’t know that I’ve ever had to wrestle and duke it out with the Lord so much and be so dependent on Him before. Somehow He just brought me to a place this year where the only time I could find rest and some sense of peace was when I was talking to Him. He became real to me. My relationship with Him is a lot more honest. And time consuming. I’m thankful for that.
6. I cannot wait until I am finished with classes this summer. It will be a big relief to not have homework anymore!
7. I want to learn to CHILL OUT. That’s my new goal.
I think that’s about it for now. Have a great weekend!